I barely knew the LORD the day he got into my boat. A few days earlier I saw him preaching in our synagogue in Capernaum, when he healed a man with an unclean spirit. Then he just invited himself over to our house! He healed my mother-in-law of a fever, then healed many other people that evening. It was all very exciting, but I had a family to feed, and so did James and John. So, we went fishing.
It was the worst night ever on the lake. We spent all our energy hauling in the nets countless times for nothing, not a single fish. There we were cleaning our nets on the beach, and looking forward to a morning nap, when I heard some people gathering behind me. I turned and, to my surprise, I saw Jesus sitting in my boat! He smiled and waved me over with some urgency as more people gathered around. I felt a certain need to rescue him, so I dropped my net and ran to him. James and John noticed and did the same.
“Do me a favor.” Jesus said to me. “Hop in and put out a short distance from the shore.”
So I climbed in, quickly followed by James and John, and we pushed away from the swarming crowd.
“Thanks,” he said with a smile. And then he began to preach. Suddenly I forgot about my need for a nap. I was mesmerized by his words. His stories and commentary filled my empty heart with wisdom and hope and even joy!
The sun had risen much higher in the sky when he finally stopped speaking to the crowd, turned around and faced us. Then he looked in my eyes with excited anticipation and said, “Put out into deep water and lower your nets for a catch!”
“I know you are a healer and a very wise teacher,” I thought to myself, “but this is the dumbest thing you’ve said all morning.”
Jesus kept looking at us with hope sparkling in his eyes during a very awkward silence. So I finally said, “Master, we have worked hard all night and have caught nothing.”
His loving eyes looked deep into my heart as if to say, “I know. I understand your emptiness and hunger. That’s why I’m here.”
I thought, “Well, what have I got to lose except for a few more calories… and my pride.”
“Okay,” I said, “at your command I will lower the nets.” So we did. And, well you know the story. We filled two boats with so many fish that we nearly sank them both!
I knew right then that he was more than a great healer, and more than a wise teacher. Who alone can fill the waters with fish and command them to swim into our nets? God the Creator was somehow working through him, with him or in him.
I was drenched by a fear of the LORD which conquered my pride. I knew I was unworthy to be in his presence. So I fell at his knees and said, “Depart from me, LORD, for I am a sinful man.”
As I look back upon it now, I understand what Jesus was doing. I had to admit my unworthiness due to sin. He was probably thinking, “Now I can work with that. Because it is for this reason that I have come.”
“Do not be afraid,” he said; “From now on you will be catching men.”
So if you feel sinful or unworthy, take a lesson from me: That’s why Jesus came, for you. When you admit your sinful unworthiness, you realize how empty you and your neighbors are until he fills you with his merciful love. Your sinful unworthiness does not disqualify you from fishing; it makes you better at it. Do not be afraid to let Jesus get into your boat and lead you into the deep waters of his next miracle.